Gramesis

In the beginning my English Teacher created nouns and verbs.
And the verbs were without form and voice, and darkness was upon the face of the deep - My Teacher. And her shadow moved across the face of her pupils.
And she said, "Let there be grammer." And there was grammer.
And Teacher saw the verbs, and laughed, and said that it was good, and she divided the bright students from those who remained in darkness.
And Teacher gave the bright students A's and kept the others after school. And the homework and the bell were the first day.
And Teacher said "Let there be a sentence in the midst of the words, and let it divide the nouns from the verbs."
And Teacher made the sentence and diagrammed it on the board; I looked and saw that it was so.
And Teacher called the sentence declarative. And the capital and the period were the second day.
And Teacher said, "Let the noun words in the sentence be gathered unto one place, and let the verb words appear." and it was so.
And Teacher called the verb words predicate and the gathering together of noun words called she the subject; and Teacher saw that it was good.
And Teacher said, "Let the predicate bring forth modifiers, and transitive verbs yielding objects and the intransitive verbs yielding complements after their own kind, whose place is in itself, within the predicate." and it was so.
And the predicate brought forth modifiers, and transitive verbs yielding objects after their kind, and intransitive verbs yielding complements whose place was in itself, after their own kind; the Teacher saw that it was good - and confusing.
And the active and the passive were the third day.
And Teacher said, "Let there be modifiers in the firmament of the subject to further confuse and divide the students in the classroom, and let them be for proper nouns, concrete nouns, mass nouns, collective nouns, pronouns, and abstract nouns.
"And let them be for to give meaning to the subject and to enhance the predicate." and it was so - confusing.
And Teacher made two great words: the greater word - adjective - to rule the noun, and lesser word - adverb - to rule the verb; the made the conjunction also.
And Teacher set them in the sentence in order to make it more difficult to diagram.
And to make it easier for her to divide the bright students from those who remained in darkness. And Teacher saw that her system was good.
And the phrase and the clause were the fourth day.
And Teacher said, ""et thje verbs bring forth abundently the many verb forms, the gerunds, infinitives, and participles, the subjunctives, the auxiliary verbs, the linking verbs, and the phrasal verbs."
And Teacher created mood for every living creature that moveth, and tense for all time, and voice after their kind; and Teacher saw that it was good.
And Teacher blessed them saying, "Be fruitful, and multiply in complexity, and fill young minds with bewilderment an let the bewilderment multiply into chaos in thir minds."
And the lecture and the English test were the fifth day.
And Teacher said, "Let the nouns and verbs bring forth living sentences after thir own kind, book reports, essay questions, and English themes for the students to write." and it was very so.
And Teacher made all these things for the Freshman English students to do, and everything that creepeth into her mind she gave them to do; and Teacher saw to it that it was good.
And Teacher said "Let us make one project in out image, after our likeness; and let the project have dominion over the other projects, and over every subject of the college students."
So Teacher created the research paper in her own image, in the image of Teacher created she it; boring and difficult created she it.
And Teacher blessed it and Teacher said unto the research paper, "Be fruitful, and multiply and replenish the supply of dropouts, and subdue the remainder of the college students, and have dominion over the other projects and over every single grade that the students receive."
And Teacher said, "Behold, I have given you every lessen on English grammer which will help you in preparing your paper and every lesson on English usage which will help you to get a passing grade on your paper; to you it hath all been given.
"And to every beast of the earth, and ot every fowl of the air, and to every thing that creepeth into the classroom wherein there is life, I have given every rule and principle for good English." And it was so.
And Teacher saw everything that she had made, and behold it was very good. and the Bib cards and the final draft were the sixth day.
Thus the verbs and the nouns were finished, and everything had its purpose.
And on the seventh day Teacher ended her work, which she had made, and she rested on the seventh day from all her work which she had made.
And Teacher blessed the seventh day, and sanctified it; and all the students who had worked also rested from their work.
And on the seventh day Teacher sat down on a nearby stone to begin the drudgery of correcting the freshman research papers; and the freshman students saw that ti was so; they smiled. It was very good.

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